About Lisa Creager Part 4
Heeelllloooo!!
I am doing a happy dance because I’m so grateful you’re here!!
Hey, let’s finish this up shall we!!
Memorizing Scripture with My Kids……
I had been memorizing scripture with my kids for quite a few years so that they could win their awards at Awana (Approved Workmen Are Not Ashamed); a child’s church setting every Wednesday night.
I got the scripture below by asking Google what is the meaning of A.W.A.N.A., because I forgot!
2 Timothy 2:15 “Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does NOT need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth”
I then looked in the KJV and it says… “Of these things put them in remembrance, charging them before the Lord that they strive not about words to no profit, but to the subverting to the hearers”.
My bible says the same as the one I received from Google. Hmmmm…
From memorizing scripture to this……
One day in preschool we carpooled to a farm and one Mom in particular that I desired to be friends with (never happened by the way) drove with me.
She came from a church where you could be touched on the forehead and fall to the ground (being touched by the holy spirit, if I remember correctly).
She was blessed with this particular happening, so I assumed she would have memorized some scripture?
I mean, that is some pretty intense spiritual stuff to have happen and not want to understand it more by knowing scripture. But, that’s my logical thinking…..
But, no….. she hadn’t and didn’t. Okay…
She was also one of those parents that I had witnessed looking down at those she believed were not as high as her in spirituality.
With these experiences I was having with others, I felt they didn’t jive at all with my own feelings on being a loving person as God intended.
My question was….
How on earth did some of God’s children get “a memo” that some of God’s OTHER children…. are not good enough???
It wasn’t just her or that incident though, I was also witnessing Sundays after church, going to restaurants and watching and hearing “church folks” be absolutely RUDE to the waitresses etc. WTFlip??????
I Wanted a Change……
ALL of this was such a BIG deal for me; it made me realize that I did NOT want to be that type of Christian.
But……that is what we are “LABELED” as in society.
So…..I made a secret choice to find another way.
I began taking my kids to different churches so I could see how other “followers of God” related to life.
I found that everywhere we attended, some people were extremely loving and some, not so much.
I spent many months reading different scriptures from different bibles, I even read a Scientology book (not sure which one) by L. Ron Hubbard, and I dove into studying Mormon scripture.
It was very intriguing to connect certain beliefs and or scriptures that were similar.
This was done in the 1990’s so I don’t remember what I discovered!
I just know that all of this studying left me with WAY more questions!!
But when you love God and your walk has shown you happiness and joy, for me, it NEVER truly leaves you.
Getting baptized was all I had left……
I finally decided to have us try out this little church 3 miles from our home in Allegany, Oregon, the tiny little Allegany Church.
I chose to get baptized after all of this…I literally had nowhere else to go with all of my studies.
I sat with the Pastor for over an hour and asked him so many questions about life, unfortunately he could not answer fully and so he did not quell my curiosity…..
I got baptized anyway.
I know for me that in that moment in time it was all I had left to do and I was very proud of myself and felt a certain knowing of peace.
We attended there every Sunday until June of 1999, when we moved closer to town.
For some reason, my husband Byron came home one day in April/May of 1999 and had found a second home for us to purchase “in town” and so we rented out our home, which was nearly paid off.
We purchased that home and on the day school let out for summer, we were packing up and moving.
Terminal Diagnosis
Within a few months Byron wasn’t feeling well, he had a few tests done and at his appointment his doctor gave us a “terminal diagnosis” of a lung disease.
Interstitial fibrosis, which basically means some type of fiber got lodged in his lung(s) and had caused so much scar tissue that the scar tissue was taking over.
The doctor gave him 6 to 8 years left to live his life.
The ONLY person in my life who I had spent my early 16 adult years with, the one that grew with me, my best friend.
The ONE person who KNEW I was WEIRD and EMBRACED IT!!
The ONE person that I could ALWAYS count on!!
The ONE and only person who created my family with me!!
The ONE adult person who FIRST truly LOVED ME!!
Tragedy Struck …
Six months later, he passed.
Our lifeline, our rock, our everything, our Byron (the ONLY person in my life that accepted ALL OF ME, unconditionally) passed away and went back home to heaven in June of 2000.
Byron came from a Catholic background with 3 sisters and 2 (living) brothers.
He met me when I was working at Englewood Market and he was across the street at Harold’s Englewood Automotive.
Byron was 32 and I was 21, I was just coming out of my confused growing up years and in my second year being a Mom now working a full time job.
Byron taught me everything I know, except my Mom taught us girls how to clean and tidy up a home!
Byron was like that too, keeping things in their right places, cleaning up the kitchen after meals etc.
He was an excellent Father and had no problem listening, understanding, and finding easy solutions anytime we needed family meetings to discuss any particular situations we found ourselves in.
Byron taught me that I can be weird and act how I act and still have a husband who thinks I’m from another planet but loves me unconditionally, like my kids did!
Byron was always there when I needed him, ALWAYS!
Life has not been the same since, but I know he is ALWAYS with us in spirit, he has never left us!
I AM grateful for all of this whirlwind of bizarre life situations.
I AM grateful for the emotional healing I have learned during these past few years with understanding and integrating the energy of gratitude in my every day!
SEEING past the Pain…
I only just recently learned this by slowing down and allowing myself to feel what I am feeling and being OKAY with it.
It has gifted me with realizations of many things in my life today that have turned into absolute GOLD, through the puzzle pieces of time.
When we are ready to see why they were there and how our life got shaped because of them.
Then we are able to understand or get a grasp of the spiritual work being done in our life behind the scenes for our highest and greatest good.
I agree though, that when shit hits the fan, it’s absolute horror at times, NO DOUBT ABOUT IT!!!
When and if you’re open enough, in your current life moments, and are willing to grow and understand, you will look back and YOU WILL SEE the absolute positive, life altering, uplifting ways, you grew and prospered.
It’s there, you just need to BE and FEEL the LOVE to understand it ALL and continue to GROW without judgment (on yourself).
Life…
I’ve heard this saying a lot these past 2 years.
Life isn’t happening to you, it is happening for you!!
And it’s not just YOU (even though that is what we believe), it is YOU AND SPIRIT all of the time!
When you allow your awareness to include the absolute knowing that spirit is working in and through you.
You are then able to co-create your desires into real life, with a bit of practice of course. We will get more into that on another post.
Ready, willing AND able…..Spirit is ALWAYS here for YOU!!!! ALWAYS! (please, don’t ever doubt this)
Hey, I am truly grateful for being able to explain some parts of my life here and having you read it, as these 4 pages are just a GLIMPSE of what has happened in my life.
I want you to realize that saying “there is light at the end of the tunnel” is true!
My intention is to share the surprising life changes weaved in and through the daily writing of gratitude and I’m hoping you can find your beginning of the easy life through these pages of love and understanding.
You know, one thing I AM realizing here, is that I have been able to get a lot of this history off of my chest/heart and on to paper.
It’s like the heavy is being lifted off my shoulders! Thank you God!! lol!
It is a healing modality….and I’m here for it and I’m very grateful for these pages BUT most of ALL your curiosity!
Thank you so much for spending your quality time reading some of my life stories.
I hope you can find moments to allow yourself to absorb some of what I have been learning these past two years from all of this.
The reality for every human is that we are all in this together!!
May peace follow you wherever you go everyday!!
Truth be told…..I am grateful that you are here because of gratitude!!
See you in the next post!!
WooHoo
